So, it took me two days but I did finally muster the enthusiasm to make big pot of rice and a big pot of lentils. Some days, I cannot wait to get into the kitchen, and others, well not so much.
When you think of a perfectionist, do you imagine someone who is good at anything she does, achieving whatever they want to achieve, successful no matter where he winds up? I always did. As you know I have that "woo" side to me and since I was a kid I was always curious about astrology. I knew my sign was Virgo, an Earth sign, a worrier likely with digestive issues, I felt connected to that, it made sense. One descriptor of a Virgo that didn't make sense was perfectionist. How could that be? Perfectionists work and learn and keep going to get the thing right, they keep striving, they keep achieving, and even when they do, they're hard on themselves because, well, to them, it's not perfect.
In my 20's, I learned about another kind of perfectionist. This perfectionist is so unwilling to feel that failure of not doing it perfectly that they simply don't try at all! This perfectionist is so trapped by this, they miss out on many amazing opportunities and chances. This perfectionist makes sense, this perfectionist is me.
Okay, so what does that have to do with lentils and rice? Everything.
Sometimes, I know what is holding me back in the kitchen is the idea that the next meal I make won't be the best meal ever, or maybe, won't even be good enough. I tell myself that I'll spend all this time in the kitchen and the food will suck so we'll have to order something anyway, so, why bother. Even making rice and lentils, to have a base to start with, seems silly when I'm experiencing these feelings.
Do you ever feel this way?
The nice thing is, it doesn't last. I mean, sure, I can spend all day wrapped in these thoughts sometimes, but that's less frequent. Sometimes, most times, it's only one meal. And sometimes, when I'm really feeling like fighting my old ways, I'll get up and do it anyway.
I don't hate cook though. Hate cooking just leads to terrible dishes and spreading your negative energy everywhere. If you've muttered "motherf****er" or whatever word in your vernacular that hits the same, more than twice, you're hate cooking. Back away from the pot and eat some thing you can microwave, pour a bowl of cereal with plant milk, or order up your favorite take-out. It's okay, it will pass.
Are you a perfectionist? How do you handle those days you just don't have what it takes to get a task done? Share your thoughts on this blog in the comments.
As there's still a chance of fireworks tonight, I'm sharing my blog on why we need to knock it off with the fireworks one more time. https://www.didyoubringthehummus.com/post/why-i-say-no-to-fireworks-and-why-you-should-too
Details have already gone out but I do have space for more participants to help me beta-test a 4 week go vegan program. If you'd like to learn more, send an email to didyoubringthehummus@gmail.com with the subject "I'm in!" and in the body of the email let me know which time zone you're in and I'll send the details over to you!